Home » Submitting content for Bumpkin

About Bumpkin
Submitting content for Bumpkin demonstrates how you allow children to succeed and fail without hovering over them to catch them when they fall every time. While we understand not everyone agrees with our anti-helicopter approach to parenting, we think they’re wrong. Getting muddy and dirty is good for kids. Eating bugs while playing in the yard with the neighbor’s dog might actually build character and strength in our child. A spanking shouldn’t send the cops knocking on the door. However, bad parenting should not be tolerated.

We know that a lot of folks find our perspective refreshing and helpful as they reconcile raising their own children with the way the neighbors, doctors, scientists, psychologists and other “experts” say it should be done. We believe parents are the besst ones to decide the fate of their children, and we have strong opinions on why this is true.

Directions for Writers
Writers interested in writing for Bumpkin.com may do so by submitting a writing sample via our contact page. If your article/blog post works for us, then we’ll send you directions for submitting new and original content that has never been published before.

We hope you will submit as many as you feel up to it. Just make sure they are quality and not plagiarized in any way.

Requirements

  • You’ll publish a clever/funny/controversial article on a child-rearing subject pertaining to one of the following categories: 1. eating; 2. health; 3. learning; 4. mobility; 5. playing; 6. sleeping
  • Word count must be at least 600 words per article
  • Although not required, we encourage writers to submit an original, royalty-free graphic that illustrates the post. Memes work great, too! Featured media (picture or video) should be sized width=”640″ height=”360″
  • Submissions should include hyperlinks within the body, so please submit via a Word document or some other format that retains these URLs.
  • Regular writers will be asked to submit articles via Word Press
  • Writers should try to focus the headline on a commonly searched google phrase (i.e., bathing children tips; tips for hiring a babysitter; how to spank a child, etc.)
Template for Graphic
Template for creating a graphic
Who says babies like baths?
What the template might look like

Subject and Style of writing
Bumpkin gives our writers the freedom to cover any topic they choose. Remember that you don’t have to agree with what we think and you don’t have to agree with the other writers. If spanking, for instance, is bad for you, then tell us why. But don’t be a helicopter mom about it, and respect the rights of parents to do as they please when raising children. Remember that humor and controversy go VERY FAR with our audience. FUNNY is always better than anything else.

As a recommendation on how to structure your article, you may consider writing it using the following 3 sections:

  1. Introduction – The first paragraph is the introduction, in which writers introduce YOUR ARGUMENT while capturing the reader’s interest. The introduction should always include a FUNNY STORY and include your argument: “Some people think …. but they are wrong because ….”
  2. Body – The second paragraph is the body of the article, which supports the argument with at least 3 FACTS that may be linked to other pages on the Internet supporting each fact. (Writers should provide these URLs as hyperlinks). Facts can be based on scientific studies, a story that happened to the writer or someone else, or on some expert opinion offered by another blogger or source. The body of the article should be interesting and told in a logical manner. This is where writers often use quotes with funny dialogue.
  3. Conclusion – The last act of blog is the conclusion, in which writers pull everything together. The last line of the article should be something clever and concise.
  4. Search Engine Optimization (Not required)
  1. Focus Keyword – A writer’s article should have a focused keyword that best describes the subject about which that blog post covers. The best keyword is no more than five words and includes what someone might put in a search engine to find out about the subject covered in the blog. For instance, if the blog were about giving children baths in the rain, a good focus keyword would be “bathing my child in rain” or “are rain baths good”. Obscure can be good, provided that the blog thoroughly covers that subject.
  2. Headline – The headline must not exceed 60 characters and should include the Focus Keyword.
  3. Meta Description – The meta description is limited to 156 characters and is the summary of the blog post. Make it unique and descriptive, and it should include the focus keyword but not necessarily the headline.

Payment to Writers
Bumpkin.com pays writers for each article published on its website. We do not pay for any articles submitted otherwise. The payment is an incentive rather than compensation since we are not profiting from this website. We don’t expect that any writer could survive on such low pay, but we do think they are investing in a good cause that might one day become sustainable for all its participants. Despite the advertisements and other methods we’ve employed for generating income at Bumpkin.com, we don’t actually make any money (we lose a lot, actually). In the future we hope to break even and eventually make money – and we’ll pass that money along in kind to those writers who have joined us.

Topic Ideas for Writers
We don’t limit our writers to any particular topic, but we do expect that they understand and agree with our anti-helicopter policies when it comes to writing for the website. It’s best for writers to review the history of articles on our website to see what others are doing. Here are a few suggestions that have been covered in the past:

  • Why I let my child drink alcohol
  • Why I let my baby sleep in my own bed
  • Why I give my kids sugar cereal
  • Why I think a pacifier should be used until the age of 5 years old
  • Why mobile phones are good for kids
  • Why computers are good for kids
  • Does homeschooling make kids weirder or smarter?
  • Why vaccinations are killing our kids
  • Why vaccinations are protecting our kids
  • Why circumcision or no circumcision is important
  • Why Santa or no Santa (or other legendary make believe characters)
  • ADHD debates – real or not
  • Cloth vs disposable diapering
  • Natural childbirth vs pain med use
  • Fertility treatments vs the old fashioned way of conception
  • Second hand vs non second hand items for children
  • Adoption issues
  • Why unconditional love can lead to problems with my children
    • Teens can fail to live up to their end of the bargain when they get arrested, mouth off or otherwise don’t reciprocate their love
  • Discipline and Punishment: What is the Difference?
    • Why both are important to teaching children self-control and life skills
  • Why I let my child wander alone in the grocery store
    • Allowing a child’s autonomy to grow may mean forcing them to learn to navigate the world in certain controlled situations
  • Why I learned to love myself more than my children
    • Good parents put themselves first
    • I believe there is a hierarchy that deserves my love: 1. God 2. Me 3. Partner 4. Child. When this order becomes shuffled, then there is no way to have all four of these important elements lined up properly.
  • Why I don’t always praise my children
    • By always telling kids that their art is great, their music sounds fabulous or that their behavior is perfect, we set ourselves up for a bigger failure down the road
  • Why good parents don’t live vicariously through their children
    • When a child leaves the house to be independent, your codependence will result in them pushing you away
    • Children need strong role models in parents who have jobs hobbies and careers that demonstrate that balance is important
  • Why I loathe my ignorant child
    • A good parent recognizes that “s/he’s just a child and doesn’t know any better” isn’t an excuse for bad behavior, because the reason kids have parents is so the parents can teach them to know better. Good parents understand that children have to be taught how to behave and actually put effort into teaching these things.
  • I am not my child’s servant
    • Kids need responsibilities to feel mature and part of the family, as well as to develop the skills they’ll need for living on their own.
    • By the time kids reach their teens, parents can feel overwhelmed, frustrated and resentful toward children who don’t do anything for themselves.
  • I’m friends with my son second and parent to him first
    • Parents need to be teachers, leaders, providers and disciplinarians.
    • You’re running a business, the business of raising a family
    • Friendship is earned
  • Why I let my child be lazy
    • Well, only sometimes we let them be lazy. More likely, we allow them time to be lazy during the day. Children who overschedule their children’s lives can create anxiety and their creativity can be compromised.
    • Busy boys and girls are more susceptible to stress.
  • Why I like my child being broke
    • Teaching financial responsibility starts with simulated deprivation
    • Spoiling a child happens when you always say yes to them when they ask for something
    • Saying NO to a child teaches them to do it for themselves
  • Why I drink booze in front of my children
    • Responsibility is taught by parents who demonstarte proper behavior with alcohol.
    • Hiding things never works
    • Showing them that you never drive after drinking will stick with them for life
  • Why I think McDonalds is good for our child
    • It is an occasional treat that demonstrates moderation
    • We go there as a way to meet new cultures
    • The food is good
  • The inlaws think I’m too laid back with childrearing
    • Being in control of your anxiety means having everything lined up
    • Not overreacting to a baby’s crying
    • I let my baby “cry it out”
    • I don’t change the diaper every hour
    • I think a bath every week is better than a bath every day
    • Clothes should be optional
  • My dirty house is good for my baby
    • Germs are good these days, just ask the experts
    • Animal fur prevents allergies in children, just ask the experts
    • I’m more involved with making my children happy than my house happy

Directions for Editors

  1. Log Into “Pending” posts to find your next article to edit: http://bumpkin.flywheelsites.com/wp-admin/edit.php?post_status=pending&post_type=post
    (Pending stories are those that boggers have submitted and are considered ready for publication. Unlike the “Drafts” where writers are currently working on blogs to post later.)
  2. Click “Edit” underneath the oldest pending post in the cue
  3. Edit Page – The headline must not exceed 60 characters and should include the Focus Keyword.
  4. Permalink – Should be the same as the headline, but divided by dashes (i.e., This is the headline = this-is-the-headline)
  5. Add Media – Button used to upload pictures for inclusion in the body of the article
  6. Body – Word count must be at least 600 words.
  7. Format – Only use the default formatting. All headlines and callouts may be in bold. Word count must be at least 600 words per article
  8. Word Press SEO by Yoast
    • Focus Keyword – A writer’s article should have a focused keyword that best describes the subject about which that blog post covers. The best keyword is no more than five words and includes what someone might put in a search engine to find out about the subject covered in the blog. For instance, if the blog were about giving children baths in the rain, a good focus keyword would be “bathing my child in rain” or “are rain baths good”. Obscure can be good, provided that the blog thoroughly covers that subject.
    • SEO Title – Leave blank (will replicate title)
    • Headline – The headline must not exceed 60 characters and should include the Focus Keyword.
    • Meta Description – The meta description is limited to 156 characters and is the summary of the blog post. Make it unique and descriptive, and it should include the focus keyword but not necessarily the headline.
  9. Publish – Click “Save Draft” button to save your work as you go. Do not bother with the “Status” or “Visibility” or “Revisions”. I ask that you schedule your articles for a week day the following week (i.e., Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday or Friday) and always at 6:30 am ET. Please do not publish any articles during the current week (i.e, always make sure you are assigning days for the following week). By clicking the blue “Schedule” button, the article will automatically publish on that day.
  10. Format – Always select “Standard”
  11. Category – Please choose only one of the following categories: 1. eating; 2. health; 3. learning; 4. mobility; 5. playing; 6. sleeping
  12. Tags – Up to six common key phrases that best describe the article
  13. Open Graph Object Type – IGNORE THIS FIELD
  14. Feature Image – Must include a royalty-free graphic that illustrates the post. Memes work great, too! Featured media (picture or video) should be sized width=”640″ height=”360″ It may be necessary to edit this image to fit this size. It is okay to have white space around it.